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Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: March 27, 2010

March 27, 2010   ·   0 Comments

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
March 27, 2010
Doug Maynard


Well, I’m back. I’m Doug and this is wrestling’s most eclectic column, the one and only “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.

My plans were to go into a long-winded recap of some of my fondest memories of Starcade, the true “Grandaddy of them all” wrestling PPV and then follow it up with my predictions for the WWE’s biggest show of the year, Wrestlemania 26. But you know the old cliche about the best of plans? I remember now why I put the columns on hiatus to begin with. Same old story and same old song and dance.

I have a half-written column about Starcade that may one day, at some point, see the light of day. But it won’t be today. Instead, all you’re getting is a bunch of predictions about the biggest matches on the grandest stage of them all, Wrestlemania 26. The WWE has done a really fantastic job building up towards this event. None of the matches are second string and it really does look like it will be a show worth watching.

But enough of the chit-chat. Time is short and so is my ex-boyfriend. Guess that’s why he’s an ex…lol. Lets do this.

Tossing Salt Predictions for Wrestlemania 26…

Career versus Streak: The Undertaker versus Shawn Michaels

The career of Shawn Michaels versus The Streak. I am extremely torn on how I feel this should go and who’s career will continue after Sunday night. I can’t see Undertaker willingly giving up his legacy and claim to fame to anyone. Yet, if anyone has the stroke and capability to take out the Dead Man and end the streak, it would have to be Shawn Michaels.

But then something occurred to me. In the wrestling business, the streak of the Undertaker is a rare gem, to be cherished and respected. It’s a valuable piece of the legacy, of The Undertaker, Wrestlemania and the WWE, and I can’t see them tossing it away so easily, especially for someone who doesn’t need the rub.

But retirements, as we’ve seen countless times with Hulk Hogan, Mick Foley, Ric Flair, Terry Funk, Sting, Abdullah the Butcher, Bret Hart and Vince McMahon, just to name a few, that actually last are few and far between. Shawn is tired and wanting a vacation. So here’s the window opening up.

I expect that we’ll have a match that tells one heck of a story with both men giving everything they have. Shawn will come as close as any man ever has in ending the Undertaker’s streak. But in the end, close just won’t be close enough. Shawn will nail Taker with the “Sweet Chin Music” but will be distracted and attacked by his disgruntled partner, fresh off a loss to the Celtic Warrior earlier in the night, as Triple H storms the ring and clocks HBK with a series of chair shots, followed by the pedigree.

HHS leaves HBK laid out cold and Undertaker, oblivious to what just happened, recovers to see HBK laid out. One quick “Last Ride” and it’s all over. The streak goes to 18-0. And HBK is finished in the WWE.

Until he comes back in a few months to seek revenge against his “best friend” and “partner”, who cost him his career, most likely at Summer Slam or Survivor Series. So there you go. The streak continues, but HBK has a purpose in putting the retirement on hold as he seeks revenge. And Hunter gets to turn heel once more. Everyone wins.

Winner: The Undertaker

To be followed by…

WWE Championship: Batista (c) versus John Cena

For the past five weeks or so, every single encounter between these two men has resulted in John Cena being beaten down, whipped up on and pretty much being Batista’s little puppy, aka “his bitch”. So Booking 101 says that at the biggest show of all, Cena gets his revenge and the fans go home happy.

Winner and NEW WWE Champion: John Cena

And in the other Championship main event…

World Championship: Chris Jericho (c) versus Edge

Everything here says that Edge will win. He seems to have the advantage going in, but I think this feud between the former partners has much more life left in it and needs to be stretched out, at least until next month’s Extreme Rules PPV anyhow. And I love seeing Chris Jericho as the World Champion. So what will happen here?

I think it all boils down to what happens earlier in the evening in the “Money In The Bank Match”. If Christian wins, as I strongly suspect (and hope) he will, I’m pretty sure that the belt will change hands. And we’ll get one of those classic moments at the end of the match where the new World Champion celebrates with his “brother” at the end of the match. Edge holds the World Championship high. Christian holds the Money In The Bank briefcase high.

And Christian turns and knocks the crap out of Edge, cashing in the briefcase and winning his first WWE World Championship and doing a heel turn in the process.

Or here’s another scenario. Same as before with Christian, briefcase in hand, comes out to congratulate and celebrate with his “brother”. Jericho is still in the ring as Edge & Christian celebrate, beaten down off to the side and forgotten in the excitement. Jericho rises and nails Edge from behind with the Codebreaker. Edge is down as Christian runs his former “Vitamin C” partner from the ring.

Christian stands there looking at his fallen brother and then at the briefcase and realizes the opportunity that’s being presented. Christian cashes in and pins Edge, who’s still out from the Codebreaker. Thus Christian becomes the World Champion, but is a tweener since he didn’t actually turn on Edge, but just took advantage of an opportunity, and we have a great three man feud between the fan favorite Edge, the tweener Christian and the heel Chris Jericho to entertain us for the next several months.
If Christian wins the Money In the Bank, I expect one of those scenarios to develop. If someone else manages to climb the ladder for the briefcase, then look for Edge to try one spear too many, Jericho dodges and hits the Codebreaker to get the win and retain the title.

But I expect to see Jay Reso, aka “Christian” win the Money In The Bank match so…

Winner and NEW World Champion: Edge

Which leads to a lot of craziness and confusion, but in the end, the Peeps rejoice as we go to an impromptu match…

World Championship Match via Money In The Bank: Edge versus Christian
Winner: NEWER World Champion: Christian

Meanwhile, on the tag team front…

Unified Tag Team Championship: The Miz & The Big Show (c) versus John Morrison & R-Truth

ShowMiz is a good team that gels well together and has the combination of smaller, cocky guy with the big monster that’s hard to beat. Morrison and R-Truth is just a team that was thrown together to give ShowMiz someone to compete against at the biggest show of the year. Given the presence of Bret Hart on the show and the induction of Stu Hart into the WWE Hall of Fame, it would have been nice to see The Hart Dynasty be the ones getting a title opportunity, but I expect we’ll see them show up during the Bret- Vince match.

Look for a fun match that has a lots of back and forth action as Miz gets to play with both Morrison and Truth for a bit. And then the Big Show enters the ring, we see the big punch and it’s all over as the champs retain their gold.

Winners and STILL Unified Tag Team Champions: The Miz & The Big Show (ShowMiz)

And then we have…

Triple H versus Sheamus

It’s no secret that Triple H is very big on Sheamus behind the scenes and is taking a personal interest in helping to push Sheamus to the next level in the WWE. But is this slobbering love affair enough to convince Triple H to lay down and do the J.O.B. at the biggest event of the year? Looking at his past record, Hunter has lost almost as much at Wrestlemania as he’s left a winner, so taking a fall isn’t really a big deal for Hunter. The big question is, will he do it for Sheamus?

I think so. I think this will be a brutal and stiff match (PG Rating be damned!) and both men will bleed, sweat, and pay the price. And Hunter will dominate towards the end. But the smallest of distractions will take it’s toll and Sheamus will hit the pump kick to steal a victory from the jaws of defeat, thus giving a pissed off Hunter a reason, at least in his own mind, to attack Shawn later in the night. Since he (Hunter) lost his match, he doesn’t want Shawn to “steal his glory” by ending the streak.

Winner: Sheamus

And the real grudge match that’s been 13 years in the making…

No Holds Barred: Vince McMahon versus Bret “The Hitman” Hart

Here’s how it goes. Bret goes after Vince. Vince dodges, weaves and runs. Vince tries to sucker-punch Bret. Bret ducks and nails Vince with a kick to the gut. A few punches by Bret and Vince is down. Bret goes for the Sharpshooter. William Regal and a few other Vince-loyalists attempt to head towards the ring, only to be cut off by the Hart Dynasty who prevent any interference. Vince taps… and taps… and taps.

Winner: Bret “The Hitman” Hart

Now, friends and partners turn to foes as we have…

Triple Threat Match: Randy Orton versus Cody Rhodes versus Ted DiBiase

Randy is being built to be the next big baby-face and for some reason that I can’t figure out, the fans are really starting to get into him and appreciate the talents of “The Viper”. He doesn’t really need to win this match and in fact, a loss might be a big help in taking him to the next level of super-stardom in the WWE.

Cody is really impressive in the ring and on the mic (when he gets to talk) and is a definite force to be reckoned with. I can see him getting a big push sometime in the near future and being moved up to a role in the upper mid-card. But not just yet.

I think this is Ted DiBiase’s time to rise and take his spot in the upper tier of the WWE ranks. But will he do it by beating Orton? Will he beat his partner, Cody? Will his father, “The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase just pay off everyone to take a dive for Teddy and do the J.O.B.? How about this?

Cody and Ted work together most of the match and pretty much decimate Randy Orton. Then comes the argument about who gets the pin and win for the match. A struggle ensues and we see Ted get the best of Cody and throw his Legacy partner from the ring. While Ted is yelling at Cody on the outside, telling him to “stay there”, a recovering Randy Orton comes from behind and nails Ted with the RKO to get the win.

Winner: Randy Orton

But it doesn’t end here. As Randy gets his arm raised, we see Brett DiBiase (Ted’s brother) come from out of nowhere and attack Orton. The DiBiase Brothers, joined by Cody, who has decided to get in on the action, beat down Orton and leave him an unconscious, beaten down mess of a man. And then Ted and Brett take down Cody and beat him down as well, leaving him laid out next to Orton.

This puts over Orton by winning the match. This gives Cody baby-face heat since he was turned on by his partner. This gives Brett DiBiase a great way to be reintroduced to the WWE audience and immediately thrust into a prominent role. And it makes Ted look like a bad-ass since he left both of his former partners laid out. It’s a win – win for all involved and I truly hope it works out as such.

Let’s move on…

CM Punk versus Rey Mysterio

So far, the build to this match has been great. CM Punk is really coming along as a heel and is easily among the best anus-clown characters currently in the WWE right now with his “Straight Edge Society”. And Rey seems more inspired and fired up than he’s been in quite a while. It really seems too early to put an end to the storyline and end things with Punk and Rey Rey.

And I don’t think they will. This whole storyline has far too much meat still left on the bone to toss it to the dogs yet. And remember how much fun we had way back when Rey was forced by Eddie Guerrero to become part of the infamous LWO?

Nope, probably not. Most of the current WWE fans that are Rey’s fan base are far too young to remember that brief storyline from twelve years ago. But it was a fun time and was a big step in helping to move Rey to the next level of his career.

And what’s old is new again. Let Rey become a reluctant member of the S.E.S. Let him be the fly in Punk’s ointment. The possibilities are endless for where they can take this storyline. But in order to do so, it has to continue. And it will.

Winner (through Straight Edge interference) – CM Punk

And here’s what is one of the most popular mainstay matches of the Wrestlemania legacy…

Money In The Bank: Christian, Matt Hardy, Drew McIntyre, Kane, Dolph Ziggler, MVP, Jack Swagger, Shelton Benjamin, Evan Bourne, Kofi Kingston

Let’s go ahead and break this down to start off with. Dolph, Shelton, Bourne and Kofi don’t have a snowball’s chance to win this match. They’re here to do the crazy spots and act like lunatics. Kane doesn’t need it to be over and both MVP and Swagger have had their pushes stopped and re-started so many times, I can’t really picture them having much luck winning either.

So that leaves Christian, Matt Hardy and Drew McIntyre. Matt has the following and everyone loves him, but since his brother decided to “defect” to TNA, I don’t see Vince and company putting Matt in a high profile spot (not that they would hold a grudge or anything…lol). Drew McIntyre is Vince’s “chosen one”, but after losing two qualifying matches to get into the event (which were later removed from his record, of course) and then beating a ham & egger for his spot, it would be a major slap in the face to have him win this event.

So I’m going for the man who led ECW for the past year, the two-time NWA World Heavyweight Champion, the former tag team partner of both Chris Jericho and Edge, Captain Charisma, to listen to the Peeps and do as only he can do… climb that ladder and claim that all-so-important briefcase. (And then, as I explained earlier, go out later in the evening and capture his first ever WWE World Championship.)

Winner and Mr. Money In The Bank: Christian

And our bathroom break match of the evening…

Eve Torres, Beth Phoenix, Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim & Mickie James vs. Alicia Fox, Vickie Guerrero, Maryse, Layla & Michelle McCool

Does anyone even really care about this one? Will it even be on the card? If any match deserves to be the “dark match” for the Wrestlemaina event, this is the one. All the girls who can actually wrestle (Beth, Gail and Mickie) are on the same team. The other team is full of hotties (Alicia, Marys, Layla) who look great and can sell posters, but have no place in a wrestling ring.

And then we have Vickie. I love me some Vickie Guerrero (Excuse Me!) but she has no place at all in a wrestling ring. Maybe outside as a manager or for moral support, but not in the ring as a competitor. Hopefully, she’ll use her power as an executive to pull some strings and Katie Lea will replace her as the fifth lady wrestler for her team.

Or maybe Jillian Hall. Where is she at? Probably stuck doing a comedy bit with Santino, but she’s a heck of a wrestler. I’d much rather see Jillian or Katie as one of the in-ring stars instead of Vickie. I surely hope so anyhow.

The match will be lots of T&A, lots of blown spots and hopefully very short and very sweet. And since she’s being built as the top lady babyface of Smackdown, I expect that the end will come when Beth Phoenix unleashes her wrath and decimates the opposing team. And the faces win and everyone gets a happy moment.

Winners: Beth Phoenix, Eve Torres, Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim and Mickie James

So there you have it – my predictions for what will easily be one of the biggest and best Wrestlemania’s of all time. The card is stacked and with the possible exception of the Divas match, no real clunkers or crappy matches in the bunch. It should be a good and fun show and, dare I say it, well worth the high prices the WWE is charging us to witness this annual extravaganza. It looks as if, for once, it might just well be worth every single penny. I surely hope so.

And I guess that does it for me today. It was fun doing this and hopefully, I’ll be able to get my act together and get more editions of “Tossing Salt” out in the near future. I’m starting to get interested in wrestling again and when that happens, anything is possible. No promises, but we’ll see.

Comments and questions can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com. Come visit me at MySpace at www.myspace.com/salt_palace and at Facebook at www.facebook.com/saltpalace. Add me at both places. You know you want to.

I’m Doug and “dat is all de’ people need to know”. Have a great weekend, enjoy Wrestlemania and I’ll catch you on the flip side. Until the next time…

Ubuntu!

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